Monday, November 22, 2010
Is there REALLY a reason to be THANKFUL??
As Thanksgiving is drawing closer, I hear and read what people are Thankful for, and wonder why I am not feeling that way about the things that I have. Should I be Thankful for the things that I have, when the one thing I want I can't have.I have a home, clothes on my back, food on my table a wonderful and loving husband and a supportive family, friends,my health, a car, a job, I live in a country that I can practice the religion of my choice, I have the freedom to choose what I want to do,and much more. I pretty much have everything any girl could ever ask for, but one thing... a child. I remember growing up and my sister and I would be playing in our room with my little yellow haired Cabbage Patch doll, and she was my daughter, I fed her, changed her did her hair( as much as you could style a head full of yellow yarn). Was that my chance? Is that all I am going to get? I see people all around me with their arms full of these adorable babies and I so want that to be Jared and I. Everyone says to "be patient" "give it time" "someday Danielle it will be your turn" I love the kind words people say to me to help me feel better, but it still hurts. I was talking (IM-ing) to a friend who has been struggling with this same infertility problems as Jared and I have, after talking to her, I got an over whelming feeling that I was being selfish for not being grateful for what I have. The pas week at school, my Kindergartner's have been working in what they are grateful for and it is as simple as... Christmas, their beds, their grandpa and grandma, brothers and sisters. They are 5 and can find many things to be Thankful for and here I am 29+ and I can't be grateful for anything that I have, because I don't have what I want... to me that sounds like a spoiled brat. Well, I am very grateful for my home, clothes on my back, food on my table a wonderful and loving husband and a supportive family, friends,my health, a car, a job, I live in a country that I can practice the religion of my choice, I have the freedom to choose what I want to do,and much more. And someday I will get what I want, it may not be in this lifetime, but someday I will.